Yeah, you read me right. And I mean exactly what you think I mean. Of course it’s more fun to receive life advice from a person who has achieved life perfection – but some amazing advice comes from those of us who have taken a comprehensive sightseeing adventure though Diditwrongville.
Follow me on a tour of almost curse words and straight talk. I’m pulling zero punches right now, and I know you’ll hate me at least in some small part after reading this if you are working a job instead of building something. You need 7 reasons why? Because I have them.
I’m Talking Directly To You.
It’s possible you’re thinking right now: “SomeFriendXYZ should totally read this; he’s a miserable lump of feelings.” Yeah, he probably should then. But you need to turn that mirror onto yourself. Stop bowing in humble praise to your mortgage company or the credit man and say EFF YOUR JOB.
- I’m dancing in front of my computer right now in public. Your job let you do that? NO? Looks like you’re being bound by some BS unspoken rules of conduct that no one will tell you about until you break one of them and become “the example.” That means if you have an idea, you have to consider how much red tape you want to wade through just to get it considered for implementation. That means you have to play some dumb office politics game to even have the words that come out of your mouth acknowledged. What you have is a job, not a career position. You are not helping build Schlitz. You’re avoiding a gap in your resume. EFF THAT JOB.
- Your boss gives you compliments but they don’t make you feel good. That’s because they’re backhanded compliments. Your boss is telling you to your face that he thinks you’re stupid or desperate. I know you’re neither of those things. EFF THAT JOB. Oh, you are? EFF THAT JOB because you have some work to do pronto on your self-confidence and your current situation is NOT THE PLACE to show personal improvement (it will be met with hostility).
- You partake in solitary lunch to avoid your workmates. This is a massive and deeply red flag. You shouldn’t need a rest period away from all humanity after just 4 hours of work. Unless you work in retail, EFF THAT JOB.
- You were lured in with the promise of “autonomy” and you’ve yet to do anything without 4 co-signers. This right here is straight up lying. There is no shortage of SKILLED job candidates, so choosing a professional to join a certain team shouldn’t take lies to persuade them to sign up for that fabulous position. Hiring managers: if you need a short order cook, please don’t go pulling chef resumes. And YOU – if you’re stuck saying “ok, right away” instead of “ok, here’s the plan” then honey……EFF THAT JOB.
- Your job is a drain on your personal relationships. Unless you’ve signed up to sell Girl Scout Cookies, Tupperware, Pampered Chef, Avon or Mary Kay products…your job should not be asking to your sweep through your personal relationships to surface leads for every promotion. EFF THAT JOB.
- You work for a company that sells a crappy product or service, or talks crazy to customers. You are not here to lie. Your morals are not for sale. Unless they are, and if so, GET THE EFF OUT, I CAN’T HELP YOU. But if you have a problem with what your employer does, you are condoning and encouraging it by staying on their team. You’re not doing all you can if your heart’s not in it, so either try to change what’s happening or EFF THAT JOB.
- Your job leaves you emotionally drained. Folks are going to try to tell you not to take your work personally. I say, it’s what you spend at least 60% of your waking hours on. You better take it personally, because if you’re doing it right, you pour yourself into it. Don’t mix your life essence into something toxic. Business IS personal. All business is by people, about people, and for people, no matter how you slice it. No business makes a sale ever, unless there are at least 2 people involved (one to sell, one to buy). So it’s personal. And you’d better protect your person. If that job is draining your will, your spark, your vitality – EFF THAT JOB.
EFF That Job. You’re the Poo.
Look, the bottom line is if you’re working a job, you’re working for someone else. You are spending your time, effort, creativity and blood pressure to safeguard THEIR SUCCESS. Not yours – theirs. They care absolutely nothing about your success, happiness or wellbeing. They actually don’t care if your fridge is empty or if rats burrow through your mattress. In order for you to claim your own success, you need to start sucking on other people’s life force too. That’s how it works in the job-for-money framework.
So if you want to work IN PARTNERSHIP with someone, if you want to claim your success and contribute to a vision, you’d better find a CAREER position and put all the Schlitz that makes people get drunk off your genius to WORK.
I can’t tell you what your genius can achieve. But you know who can help you uncover your genius, and who CONSTANTLY pumps motivation into my being? Angela Maiers. She is a mothercrumping amazingness magnifier. If you’re stuck, get her voice in your ears.
What the hell are you doing right now? Name more reasons to say EFF THAT JOB and get on with making the future of humanity AMAZING, not just…un-fired.